The Void Review: At the Kickstarters of Madness

The Void is an exercise in patience. A movie that spends a lot of time making you think you should like it. If you think The Thing is one of the greatest horror films ever made, as I do, this movie is watching a chimp masturbate on old DVD copies of The Thing. This movie fucking sucks.

If you make a film with mostly poor performances and really obvious and dull writing but shoot it well and have “good” monster design, a good movie that does not make. If this were a fifteen minute short that covered ALL of the same plot points, I would be impressed because The Void is obviously an indie film.

So I guess I’ll fellate the makeup and monster design – because all of it is gorgeous in a Kickstarter film. The design is so very Lovecraftian with moments where they do perfectly replicate moments from The Thing. It’s like seeing counterfeit yeah, it’s still gorgeous, but… it’s fake. It looks better than The Thing (2011) and the terrible CG in that film, so for that reason, I hope the effects people from this film have very long careers. The Lovecraftian designs are very “At The Mouth of Madness” and the movie steals from “Prince of Darkness” but again, the cover song nature really hurts this movie.

Nothing feels truly of a piece, Tarantino as much as he copies all his favorite movies he doesn’t just copy moment verbatim and change none of the context or meaning. He uses moments like paint, the directors of The Void use moments from John Carpenters filmography like a 5-year-old making a dream board. The jagged edges of different moments rubbing aginst each other barely held the construction paper by Elmer’s glue.

Some of the supporting acting roles aren’t terrible, in fact, they are mostly convincing. The standout performance being Kenneth Welsh, a Canadian character actor who gives a great performance when he’s onscreen. Every moment that he’s not there is basically lifeless and boring. The lead of The Void , Aaron Poole, is like Aaron Paul if you ran him through a broken photocopiers 1000 times. He’s so dull and uninteresting as a lead that I didn’t care about how his story ended. Nor did I care about the character “The Father” played by a man I will only call Not-Tim McGraw. He’s such an obvious Kurt Russel type who has none of Russell’s magnetism on screen.

In a climate where Indie Horror crushes Studio Horror (even in years where Studio Horror is fucking great like last year), The Void is disappointing. Most of it is competent but in the moments that it’s not, it’s infuriating. So much so I can’t suggest you ever watch it. Throw this garbage in the same pile as The Monster starring Zoey Kazan.

Don’t watch The Void, in fact, go watch Prince of Darkness and hell, watch The Thing if you haven’t (for some reason). The Void a nostalgia bogged down mess of a film that makes Stranger Things feel original.

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