Writer: Mark Russell
Art: Steve Pugh
The end is nigh! In “This Month In Bedrock With The Flintstones” we start off with Fred and Wilma in the mall noting how nice everyone seems, don’t worry we will be back here soon. On the newscast the anchor points out how crime statistics are down. This leads to a funny “down by” crimes which this month happen to be brain-clubbings, grand theft wheel and witchery. Rock Stone is soon joined by a bearded fellow news anchor who says and I quote “the people of Bedrock are simply better than everyone else.” This made me let loose a mighty chuckle.
We then go to bowling with Fred and Barney and as the series has gone on (only six issues so far) we get commentary from the animals and we see Fred and Barney go into a bowling alley (which seemed to be manned by only monkeys), we see Fred take his ball out and get a strike, as soon as we get to the next panel its the equivalent of a cutaway with Fred’s ball (an Armadillo mind you) talking to a small pink elephant who in the Flintstone household saying it was a brutal day at work to which the elephant asks “so what happens–when he takes you out at night?” the Armadillo goes on to explain how he doesn’t understand why Fred is rolling him down the lane harder and harder. I, myself laughed furiously at the next word box that is the Armadillo thinking “this is it, this is where I die”. To which he throws his little arms into the air yelling “IS THIS MY LIFE?! IS THIS ALL I MEAN TO THE UNIVERSE?!” the Elephant replies with a gut punch to my feelings saying “You know, whenever they’re finished vacuuming the floor, the humans just stick me back in the closet.” This got me thinking of whenever they do a PETA satire in the book these two characters should be involved in some way or another.But BACK TO THE CLOSET! The elephant says to the armadillo that what keeps it going, there in the dark is “knowing my friend bowling ball is on the other side of the door. It makes me think. Maybe the only meaning to life is that which we get from each other.” That may be one of the most profound or funniest thing I’ve ever heard.
Meanwhile with our friendly scientist Carl Sargon he runs into Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm whom he offers jobs as he picked up a pre-historic computer called the “Applecus” his reply to Bamm-Bamm’s question “you mean we’ll be paid scientists and everything?!” with “you’ll be interns!” as being better than getting paid is something everyone who gets out of college looking for careers knows all too well. While the important thing is that Sargon discovers an asteroid headed for Earth I was laughing too hard at the use of the “scritch!” effect while the moths were in their breeding cycle. Perhaps the best reaction to the news about the asteroid is the news anchor himself. While I won’t repeat what he said just imagine the reaction of someone reading off a prompt. Meanwhile at the First Church of Gerald there’s a real “Where is my god/Why would he do this moment hilariously with someone saying that he gave up clubbing people for god….I mean Gerald and immediately does he revert to his old ways but a man opens up on an affair he is having with a woman in front of her husband and everything goes to hell rather quickly. Not only is there a man on fire but a man who grabs the legs of a flying dinosaur and shouts “TO THE MOON GREGORY! THE MOON!”
The group then heads to the Bedrock Cave of Science and Technology where Dr. Sargon actually mistook two copulating moths as a rock on his computer and was wrong about the whole thing. Soon when Pebble’s and Bamm-Bamm go to the Science Cave to see about getting their jobs back when they see the scientist who was let go to make room for them talking to a duct-taped Dr. Sargon who is taped to the wall, something he made light of earlier in the story.He quickly gives in to the other scientist’s demands as long as he gets Sargon off the wall before the moths next breeding cycle. We are then given a teaser for Issue #7 “The Earth Gets A Report Card”.Thanks for checking out the inaugural “This Month In Bedrock With The Flintstones”.